Pregnancy complications and baby loss are experienced by millions of women and their families. Yet, this remains a taboo subject with many suffering in silence. To encourage greater openness Tommy’s, the pregnancy and baby charity, have launched a new campaign Projecting Life: shining a light on unspoken grief. Amina Hatia, Midwifery Manager, Tommy’s, explains the campaign, and shares a guide to aid better conversations.
Every year, millions of families in the UK endure the heartbreak of pregnancy complications and baby loss. Yet, despite how common these experiences are, many find themselves suffering in silence. A national reluctance to talk about baby loss leaves parents feeling isolated in their grief, unsure where to turn for support.
A recent YouGov survey commissioned by Tommy’s found that more than half (53%) of UK adults avoid conversations about baby loss, often out of fear of saying the wrong thing. Only 12% felt ‘very confident’ offering support to someone affected. But avoiding the topic does not prevent pain – it can deepen it.
Projecting Life: shining a light on unspoken grief
To break the silence, at Tommy’s – the UK’s leading pregnancy research charity – we’ve launched Projecting Life, a campaign designed to encouraging open conversations about baby loss and its lifelong impact.
In February 2025, we unveiled an immersive installation in London’s Leadenhall Market, projecting shadows of children at play alongside the shadows of those who weren’t there –symbolising the invisible yet ever-present loss experienced by families. This powerful display sparked vital conversations, helping people acknowledge grief that too often goes unspoken.
As Dr. Jyotsna Vohra, Director of Research, Programmes and Impact at Tommy’s, explains:
“The trauma of pregnancy loss or giving birth prematurely is too often compounded by a sense of isolation and even shame. We must end the silence around these experiences and move further and faster towards our goal of making pregnancy and birth safe for everyone.”
Midwives play a vital role in supporting families through pregnancy loss, offering both medical and emotional care at an incredibly difficult time. Their guidance and compassionate communication can make a lasting difference in helping parents feel heard and supported.
How to talk about baby loss
One of the biggest barriers to conversation is not knowing what to say. To help, Tommy’s has developed a conversation guide, offering practical advice, shaped by the voices of parents who have experienced loss firsthand. It covers:
- Simple ways to start a conversation and show support
- What to say – and what not to say
- Listening with empathy rather than trying to ‘fix’ things
Midwives are often at the forefront of these conversations, helping parents navigate their grief from the moment of loss through their ongoing journey. Having the right words – and the confidence to use them – can provide invaluable comfort during such a vulnerable time.
Why we need to keep talking
The silence around baby loss doesn’t just affect grieving parents—it also impacts research, awareness, and progress in maternity care. Tommy’s pregnancy research has led to groundbreaking advancements, but continued progress depends on breaking taboos and ensuring pregnancy loss is recognised as a crucial health issue.
Midwives and nurses are instrumental in translating research into real-world impact, from improving bereavement care to advocating for policy changes that prioritise pregnancy safety. By working together, we can ensure that every parent receives the support they need, leading to healthier pregnancies and fewer losses.
This Mother’s Day, we urge people to start the conversations that matter. Whether it’s using the conversation guide or simply acknowledging a friend’s loss, small actions can make a profound difference. Because grief should never be met with silence.
For more information on Projecting Life and the conversation guide, visit: Tommy’s website.
Amina Hatia, Midwifery Manager at Tommy’s, the pregnancy and baby charity.
March 2025